I see your memes about drinking wine and not knowing what’s really in your travel mug. I see you looking forward to the end of the day when you can finally have a drink, because the kids were being extra trying today and driving you crazy. You feel like you have earned that drink and you deserve it. I have bad days with my kids too, but I have made the conscious decision to not turn to any addictive substance in order to cope or relax, and I worry about you when you do.
Day drinking during play dates and kids birthday parties is becoming normal, is encouraged by so many, and this worries me so much. I have to disclose that I am jaded by alcohol and very bitter towards it. This is the reaction I have to my dad dying from alcoholism, and me making the choice to be sober so I would not fall to the same fate my dad did. The thing that is so scary about alcohol addiction, is that alcohol is so readily available, socially acceptable and encouraged, and it can happen to anyone. This is why all the day drinking and wine memes worry me. It’s all fun and games in the beginning, but alcohol addiction is a very serious disease that can ruin lives, relationships and become fatal. I don’t want you to think it can’t happen to you, because I never ever thought I would lose my dad to alcoholism when he was only 55 years old; he was an amazing father who socially drank in my childhood, I never saw him abuse alcohol until I was in my late 20s.
It doesn’t bother me when people drink, my husband is a social drinker. I want our kids to learn about alcohol from a young age and how to drink responsibly, and the dire consequences of the improper use of alcohol, as they get older. I have been questioned a few times since I chose to not drink alcohol anymore, but I’m in my 30s and don’t really care what people think of me if I’m the only one not drinking at an event or gathering. My choice seems to be quite extreme to some people, they say that I could have a beer on a hot summer day or the odd glass of wine at supper and not become an alcoholic, and I see their point. However, I know that alcohol has a very strong genetic component, and I fully recognize in myself that I have an addictive personality. I 100% could see myself turning to alcohol to calm me down after a chaotic day, then justifying to myself that I “deserve” a drink, and so on and so forth. I know I need to break the cycle for my family.
This post isn’t to alcohol-shame moms, and I don’t think there’s anything inherently wrong with enjoying an alcoholic beverage, but it sincerely worries me how many moms on social media I see sharing photos of wine, cocktails and so on on a daily basis. I do not judge you when you order a drink at dinner, or even lunch. If you ask for a creme liqueur in your hot chocolate, I will still love you and enjoy being in your company. When I will start to worry is if you turn to alcohol as a coping mechanism, and you depend on it to cope. Be aware of what you’re drinking, how much you’re drinking, and how often you’re drinking—don’t become dependent on alcohol, I beg this of you as the child of an alcoholic.